Escaped Thoughts

Thu, May 20, 2004

On The Definitions Of Words

Imagine, if you will, a very large island (or a small continent if you prefer). On this island there are horses, but for various evolutionary reasons they are all brown. Every last one of them. Also on the island are people, who develop completely isolated from the rest of the world. They develop language, writing, and eventually create dictionaries, all without interacting with any other civilizations. Not unsurprisingly, their dictionary defines their word for horse basically as a large, brown, four-legged, hoofed animal.

One day, a boat arrives with people from another island/continent. Cultural exchanges of various kinds ensue, and eventually one of our island-folk visit the other island. Shortly after arriving, he sees someone riding a black horse. "What's that animal?" he asks his guide. "Why, it's a horse," she replies, confused. "I've seen many people riding them on your island." "Ridiculous," replies the man from our island, "horses are brown!" "But surely," says his guide, "you can see that it is in every practical way identical to the horses on your island, except that it happens to be brown." "Perhaps," says our islander, "but it's clearly not a horse. As you can see, it says right here in this dictionary that horses are brown, so that creature must be some entirely different animal."

At this point, it should be apparent that our islander is rather foolish. I leave it as an exercise for the reader to determine how this story applies to people who try to base their primary argument against gay marriage on the fact that marriage is defined to be between a man and a woman.

(For those of you already compiling a list of reasons why this is a terrible analogy, I invite you to consider the definition of "person" at the drafting of the US Constitution, and what bearing that has on the validity of the civil rights movement.)

Category: Society

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In Case There Was Any Doubt

Anyone unsure about Blizzard's target audience should take a look at their wallpapers. These artists are clearly all people who grew up on the old D&D books, which teach us the important lesson that fantasy-genre women wear basically no clothing. I always felt sorry for the women depicted in these books, on the covers of fantasy novels, and in now in many video games. Don't they realize how doomed they are? Their male fighting companions get full suits of plate armor, or at least a nice hauberk or something. What do the women fighters get? Chainmail bikinis, and if they are really lucky some thigh-high boots. Helmets? No way. So basically, they will be fine if their opponents attack only their breasts (or rather, the third of their breasts that's protected), but otherwise that they are SOL.

On the other hand, heroines are better off than evil women, who often don't get any clothing at all. I guess the fact that she's not human makes the nudity ok? At some point, they should give up the pretense and just strap feathers to some women's arms and legs and film porn to sell to teenagers.

Category: Society

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